om had been in the liquor business for 25 years. Finally, sick of the stress, he quit his job and bought 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible. He saw the postman once a week and got groceries once a month. Otherwise, it was total peace and quiet.
After about six months of almost total isolation, someone knocked on his door. He opened it and a huge, bearded man was standing there.
"Name's Lars, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night...thought you might like to come. About 5:00."
"Great", says Tom, "after six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you."
As Lars left, he stopped. "Gotta warn you......be some drinkin'."
"Not a problem" says Tom. "After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em."
Again, the big man started to leave and stopped. "More 'n' likely gonna be some fightin', too."
"Well, I get along with people; I'll be all right. I'll be there. Thanks again."
"More'n likely be some wild se x, too!"
"Now that's really not a problem," says Tom, warming to the idea. "I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the way, what should I wear?"
"Don't much matter ..... Just gonna be the two of us."
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Monday, December 22, 2008
hatred
The first one is the one that make incoherence of the mind so the person does not recognize what he says.
The second kind of anger does not prevent the person from knowing what he says and recognizing his intention.
There is a third kind of anger. This is where the anger will be intense so that the person’s mind is partially out of control and steers the person away from his intention. The person will regret what he does as soon as his anger subsides.
The second kind of anger does not prevent the person from knowing what he says and recognizing his intention.
There is a third kind of anger. This is where the anger will be intense so that the person’s mind is partially out of control and steers the person away from his intention. The person will regret what he does as soon as his anger subsides.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
i swept away
I never had anything happen so fast
took one look and i shattered like a glass
i guess i let it show
cause your smile told me you knew
that you’re everything i ever wanted at once
there’s no holding this heart when it knows what it wants
and i never wanted anything more than to know you
i was swept away no one in the world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i was swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
and so it begins this journey of love
the summer wind carries us to a places all or own
the words of a look
the language of touch
the way that you want me means so much
and i never wanted anything more than to love you
i am swept away
no one in this world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i am swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
ooohh i hope i wake up soon
ooooh im a victim of that crazy moon
the very first time you said my name
i knew it would never sound the same
something about me has changed forever
cant you see i am swept away?
no in the world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i am swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
away,seeing my tomorrows in your eyes
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i was swept away
without a warning like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
we were swept away
dreaming of you swept away
cause your smile told me you knew
that you’re everything i ever wanted at once
took one look and i shattered like a glass
i guess i let it show
cause your smile told me you knew
that you’re everything i ever wanted at once
there’s no holding this heart when it knows what it wants
and i never wanted anything more than to know you
i was swept away no one in the world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i was swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
and so it begins this journey of love
the summer wind carries us to a places all or own
the words of a look
the language of touch
the way that you want me means so much
and i never wanted anything more than to love you
i am swept away
no one in this world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i am swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
ooohh i hope i wake up soon
ooooh im a victim of that crazy moon
the very first time you said my name
i knew it would never sound the same
something about me has changed forever
cant you see i am swept away?
no in the world but you and i
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i am swept away without a warning
like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
away,seeing my tomorrows in your eyes
gotta find a way to make you feel the way that i do
i was swept away
without a warning like night when the morning begins the day
i was swept away
we were swept away
dreaming of you swept away
cause your smile told me you knew
that you’re everything i ever wanted at once
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
God: in a joking mood
God is in joking mood
A man was praying to god.
He said, "God?"
God responded, "Yes?"
And the Guy said, "Can I ask a question?"
"Go right ahead", God said.
"God, what is a million years to you?"
God said, "A million years to me is only a second."
The man wondered.
Then he asked, "God, what is a million dollars worth to you?"
God said, "A million dollars to me is a penny."
So the man said, "God can I have a penny?"
And God cheerfully said,
"Sure!...... .just a second.
A man was praying to god.
He said, "God?"
God responded, "Yes?"
And the Guy said, "Can I ask a question?"
"Go right ahead", God said.
"God, what is a million years to you?"
God said, "A million years to me is only a second."
The man wondered.
Then he asked, "God, what is a million dollars worth to you?"
God said, "A million dollars to me is a penny."
So the man said, "God can I have a penny?"
And God cheerfully said,
"Sure!...... .just a second.
Strange sounds
man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound; a sound like no other that he has ever heard. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man's car breaks down in front of the same monastery.
The monks again accept him, feed him, and even fix his car.
That night, he hears the same strange mesmerizing sound that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what the sound was, but the monks reply,
We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
The man says, All right, all right. I'm dying to know.
If the only way I can find out what that sound was, is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?
The monks reply, you must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are an d the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.
The man sets about his task. Some Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, I have traveled the earth and devoted my life to the task demanded and have found what you had asked for. There are 371,145,236, 284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219, 999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.
The monks reply, Congratulations, you are correct and now you are a monk.
We shall now show you the way to the sound.
The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, the sound is behind that door.
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He asks, May I have the key?
The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.
Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man requests the key to the stone door.
The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. And so it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald,...
....silver, topaz, and amethyst.
Finally, the monks say, This is the key to the last door.
The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is astonished to find the source of that strange sound.
It is truly an amazing and unbelievable sight!!!
But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk!!!
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound; a sound like no other that he has ever heard. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man's car breaks down in front of the same monastery.
The monks again accept him, feed him, and even fix his car.
That night, he hears the same strange mesmerizing sound that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what the sound was, but the monks reply,
We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
The man says, All right, all right. I'm dying to know.
If the only way I can find out what that sound was, is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?
The monks reply, you must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are an d the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.
The man sets about his task. Some Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, I have traveled the earth and devoted my life to the task demanded and have found what you had asked for. There are 371,145,236, 284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219, 999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.
The monks reply, Congratulations, you are correct and now you are a monk.
We shall now show you the way to the sound.
The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, the sound is behind that door.
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He asks, May I have the key?
The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.
Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man requests the key to the stone door.
The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. And so it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald,...
....silver, topaz, and amethyst.
Finally, the monks say, This is the key to the last door.
The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is astonished to find the source of that strange sound.
It is truly an amazing and unbelievable sight!!!
But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk!!!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
What is most important?
20% of the food you eat creates 80% of the fat!
20% of your neighbours make 80% of the noise.
20% of the people in your office do 80% of the work.
This is the 80/20 rule. You'll see it everywhere!
In 1897 an Italian economist called Pareto discovered that 20% of people in England had 80% of the money. He also found that 20% of pea pods in his garden produced 80% of his peas. Now he is famous!
His Pareto Principle predicts that ... in any situation, just a few things are much more important than all the rest.
This means:
In business: 20% of customers give you 80% of the profits.
Look after that 20%!
For students: 20% of a book's pages contain 80% of the information. Concentrate on that 20% - then read the next book.
For you: YOUR DAILY TASKS ARE NOT EQUALLY IMPORTANT. If you have ten jobs to do today, two of them will be more critical than the other eight!
Every day, figure out the 20%. Do those things FIRST.
Simply making a "to do list" is not good enough. Unless you target the 20%, you can waste 80% of your time!
Average people put average effort into lots of things.
Achievers put major effort into key things.
You can't do everything - but you can do the 20%. Don't lose sleep over the 80%.
It's not just the amount of effort that matters, but where you put it.
20% of your neighbours make 80% of the noise.
20% of the people in your office do 80% of the work.
This is the 80/20 rule. You'll see it everywhere!
In 1897 an Italian economist called Pareto discovered that 20% of people in England had 80% of the money. He also found that 20% of pea pods in his garden produced 80% of his peas. Now he is famous!
His Pareto Principle predicts that ... in any situation, just a few things are much more important than all the rest.
This means:
In business: 20% of customers give you 80% of the profits.
Look after that 20%!
For students: 20% of a book's pages contain 80% of the information. Concentrate on that 20% - then read the next book.
For you: YOUR DAILY TASKS ARE NOT EQUALLY IMPORTANT. If you have ten jobs to do today, two of them will be more critical than the other eight!
Every day, figure out the 20%. Do those things FIRST.
Simply making a "to do list" is not good enough. Unless you target the 20%, you can waste 80% of your time!
Average people put average effort into lots of things.
Achievers put major effort into key things.
You can't do everything - but you can do the 20%. Don't lose sleep over the 80%.
It's not just the amount of effort that matters, but where you put it.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
the love: Daddy's Hand
I remember Daddy´s hands, folded silently in prayer.
And reaching out to hold me, when I had a nightmare.
You could read quite a story, in the callouses and lines.
Years of work and worry had left their mark behind.
I remember Daddy´s hands, how they held my Mama tight,
And patted my back, for something done right.
There are things that I´ve forgotten, that I loved about the man,
But I´ll always remember the love in Daddy´s hands.
Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin´.
Daddy´s hands, were hard as steel when I´d done wrong.
Daddy´s hands, weren´t always gentle
But I´ve come to understand.
There was always love in Daddy´s hands.
I remember Daddy´s hands, working 'til they bled.
Sacrificed unselfishly, just to keep us all fed.
If I could do things over, I´d live my life again.
And never take for granted the love in Daddy´s hands.
And reaching out to hold me, when I had a nightmare.
You could read quite a story, in the callouses and lines.
Years of work and worry had left their mark behind.
I remember Daddy´s hands, how they held my Mama tight,
And patted my back, for something done right.
There are things that I´ve forgotten, that I loved about the man,
But I´ll always remember the love in Daddy´s hands.
Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin´.
Daddy´s hands, were hard as steel when I´d done wrong.
Daddy´s hands, weren´t always gentle
But I´ve come to understand.
There was always love in Daddy´s hands.
I remember Daddy´s hands, working 'til they bled.
Sacrificed unselfishly, just to keep us all fed.
If I could do things over, I´d live my life again.
And never take for granted the love in Daddy´s hands.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
"31 Ways To Make A Girl Smile"
1. Dont hug her friends or your friends that are girls cause she'll feel left out
2. Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if its just for a second.
3. Hug her from behind
4. Leave her voice messages to wake up.
5. Wrestle with her
6. Don't go hang out with your ex when shes not with you, you might not realize how badly it hurts her.
7. If you're talking to another girl, when you're done talking, walk over and
hug her and kiss her.... let her know she's yours and they aren't.
8. Write her notes or call her just to say "hi"..and not just at night after you've already been out with other girls.
9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your girlfriend.
10. Play with her hair.
11. Pick her up
12. Get upset if another guy touches her and she doesn't like it.
13. Make her laugh, if you can make her laugh, you can make her do
anything.
14. Let her fall asleep in your arms.
15. If she's mad at you, kiss her.
16. If you care about her, then tell her
17. Every guy should give their girl 3 things: a stuffed animal(she'll hug it every time she goes to sleep), jewelry (she'll treasure it forever), and one of his t-shirts (she'll most likely wear it to bed).
18. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you're alone.
19. Look her in the eyes and smile.
20. Hang out with her on weekends
21. Kiss her in the rain
22. Kiss her just for the heck of it
23. If your listening to music, let her listen too.
24. Remember her birthday and get her something, even if
its simple and inexpensive, it came from YOU. it means all the world to HER. it's the thought that counts.
25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it, even if you don't (it'll make her happy.)
26. Always call her when you say you will, it may not seem like it, but it does hurt her and makes her think you don't care so call even if you can only talk for a minute. Girls don't necessarily have to have hour-long conversations every night but its nice for us to hear your voice even for a quick hello.
27. Give her what she wants
28. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most.
29. Tell her shes beautiful, she needs to know her striving is working.
30. Hang out with her whenever you are free and u should be free to hang
with your girlfriend all the time
31. If u care about her...SHOW her!
2. Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if its just for a second.
3. Hug her from behind
4. Leave her voice messages to wake up.
5. Wrestle with her
6. Don't go hang out with your ex when shes not with you, you might not realize how badly it hurts her.
7. If you're talking to another girl, when you're done talking, walk over and
hug her and kiss her.... let her know she's yours and they aren't.
8. Write her notes or call her just to say "hi"..and not just at night after you've already been out with other girls.
9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your girlfriend.
10. Play with her hair.
11. Pick her up
12. Get upset if another guy touches her and she doesn't like it.
13. Make her laugh, if you can make her laugh, you can make her do
anything.
14. Let her fall asleep in your arms.
15. If she's mad at you, kiss her.
16. If you care about her, then tell her
17. Every guy should give their girl 3 things: a stuffed animal(she'll hug it every time she goes to sleep), jewelry (she'll treasure it forever), and one of his t-shirts (she'll most likely wear it to bed).
18. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you're alone.
19. Look her in the eyes and smile.
20. Hang out with her on weekends
21. Kiss her in the rain
22. Kiss her just for the heck of it
23. If your listening to music, let her listen too.
24. Remember her birthday and get her something, even if
its simple and inexpensive, it came from YOU. it means all the world to HER. it's the thought that counts.
25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it, even if you don't (it'll make her happy.)
26. Always call her when you say you will, it may not seem like it, but it does hurt her and makes her think you don't care so call even if you can only talk for a minute. Girls don't necessarily have to have hour-long conversations every night but its nice for us to hear your voice even for a quick hello.
27. Give her what she wants
28. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most.
29. Tell her shes beautiful, she needs to know her striving is working.
30. Hang out with her whenever you are free and u should be free to hang
with your girlfriend all the time
31. If u care about her...SHOW her!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
lessons
Until we learn a lesson, we keep getting it again - and again!
IF PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU ...
If your friends expect you to solve their problems, carry their stuff, clean their mess, buy their lunch - and you keep doing it - it will keep happening.
IF YOU KEEP GETTING RIPPED OFF ...
If you allow yourself to be cheated by landlords, auto mechanics and repairmen, it will keep happening.
Until you find some courage or learn some skills, you will bleed money.
IF YOU KEEP DATING JERKS ...
If you tolerate rude, lazy, selfish boyfriends - figuring any relationship is better than no relationship - you'll meet an endless stream of "partners from hell".
History repeats itself until we make a stand.
You might say, "If I was somewhere else - maybe Hawaii - or if I had different friends - I wouldn't have these problems!" Yes you would!
When we have a weakness, it's like a magnet ... wherever we go we attract the same lessons. It's a law of life.
Miserable people say, "Why does everything happen to me?"
Effective people say, "I'd better learn this lesson, it keeps coming back!"
Assume that every problem in your life is a lesson to make you stronger. Then you never feel like a victim.
IF PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU ...
If your friends expect you to solve their problems, carry their stuff, clean their mess, buy their lunch - and you keep doing it - it will keep happening.
IF YOU KEEP GETTING RIPPED OFF ...
If you allow yourself to be cheated by landlords, auto mechanics and repairmen, it will keep happening.
Until you find some courage or learn some skills, you will bleed money.
IF YOU KEEP DATING JERKS ...
If you tolerate rude, lazy, selfish boyfriends - figuring any relationship is better than no relationship - you'll meet an endless stream of "partners from hell".
History repeats itself until we make a stand.
You might say, "If I was somewhere else - maybe Hawaii - or if I had different friends - I wouldn't have these problems!" Yes you would!
When we have a weakness, it's like a magnet ... wherever we go we attract the same lessons. It's a law of life.
Miserable people say, "Why does everything happen to me?"
Effective people say, "I'd better learn this lesson, it keeps coming back!"
Assume that every problem in your life is a lesson to make you stronger. Then you never feel like a victim.
Monday, December 8, 2008
why set goals?
Sometimes we pick up the newspaper and read where an accountant has just rowed across the Atlantic in a bathtub, or where a librarian is riding a camel from L.A. to New York.
We might ask ourselves, "Why not take a plane?"
The answer to that is, "If you travel by bathtub (or camel), you arrive a whole different person to the one that left!" Not only do you reach your destination knowing a lot more about stars and weather and navigation - you know a lot more about yourself, and about your own courage and capabilities.
Buying a plane ticket doesn't have the same effect.
Likewise, when you set a goal to run a business or a marathon, when you set a goal to get a degree or a promotion, or to learn Chinese, you arrive a different person to the one that started.
That's what "goals" are really about - what they make of us in the process of achieving them. That's why we bother. Your friends and your brother-in-law won't always understand this concept!
We set goals not for what we GET, but for what we BECOME.
We might ask ourselves, "Why not take a plane?"
The answer to that is, "If you travel by bathtub (or camel), you arrive a whole different person to the one that left!" Not only do you reach your destination knowing a lot more about stars and weather and navigation - you know a lot more about yourself, and about your own courage and capabilities.
Buying a plane ticket doesn't have the same effect.
Likewise, when you set a goal to run a business or a marathon, when you set a goal to get a degree or a promotion, or to learn Chinese, you arrive a different person to the one that started.
That's what "goals" are really about - what they make of us in the process of achieving them. That's why we bother. Your friends and your brother-in-law won't always understand this concept!
We set goals not for what we GET, but for what we BECOME.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
9 attractive qualities women look for in a guy
My boy friends and I have spent many a long night brainstorming that magic formula of characteristics that drives the ladies wild. It is impossible to know just what the mixture is supposed to be, but is there one characteristic that can work alone to make a guy really attractive?
Here are the nine characteristics we've come up with. Testimony from a guy who is very much closed to me..
Sense of Humor
Everyone says how important sense of humor is, and I have learned to look for it in women. I am lucky enough to be able to make women laugh, but I'm still super single.
Trustworthy
Trust is the holy grail of a relationship. It takes years to build it, and it is so delicate. There are few things that take so long to attain that can be destroyed so quickly. So a lot of us may finally settle on a very trustworthy person when we finally find that.
Kindness
This seems like a no-brainer, but I've seen plenty of girls stay with guys who don't treat them well. So, I'm thinking that most women look for a nice guy, but the fact of the matter is that mean guys seem to get girlfriends too-and at a better rate than nice guys.
YachtMoney
I admit it: I sometimes envision myself marrying rich and sitting there doing nothing. I could lie out on my wife's yacht and host lavish parties and hear about how crazy the Roaring 20's were, when my wife's friends were my age. Money is definitely high on a lot of people's list: remember when Anna Nicole Smith married that really old rich guy? I doubt it was because she thought he was hot, funny, or great in the sack.
Super Hot
As much as we hate to admit it, the first thing we notice about someone else is how good or bad they look. But one of the first lessons we learn in the dating world is as beautiful as someone is on the outside, they could be ugly on the inside.
Confident
Confidence is based on a lot of these characteristics. You are confident if you are talented, super hot, intelligent, or wealthy most likely. But confidence also enables you to treat people better, so you are kind and trustworthy as well. Because confidence includes so many of these other characteristic, it may just be the one major thing women look for in a man.
Talented & Passionate
When someone possesses a special skill, such as visual art or guitar virtuosity, they get tons of girls. People like Jimi Hendrix, Led Zeppelin, and Tom Brady can go out with anyone they want because they are skilled. heck, I'd go out with them. Usually skill occurs in tandem with passion, another attractive quality. JHWhen someone is really good at something, but not "hot," it makes sense that they can still attract a lot of women. It's less annoying to see someone like this in a relationship than it is to see a rich mean guy in a relationship.
Intelligent
I am intimidated by women who are more intelligent than I am (which explains why I'm intimidated by about 97% of the female population). For a lot of people, intelligence is sexy. When someone is stupid, it's frustrating and boring, which is enough to drive someone away.
Convenient
One can argue that convenience is a huge driver for a relationship. Does he live near you, is he "ready" to be in a relationship, does he want to have kids or not? Everything matches up correctly. Sure, he may not be the best-looking guy or have a lot of money, but it's just what you need and it's been a long, difficult search.
If we put these characteristics on a pie chart, what would get the biggest piece of the pie with you? Again, some of these characteristics occur together: intelligence and wealth, talent and passion, kindness and generosity, convenience and wealth.
How often do women care about superficial things like money? It's scary, but sometimes I fear that no matter how funny I am, if I had lots of money I could date any cute girl I wanted.
How do all of these characteristics shake out for you when choosing a boyfriend, and are there any you'd add to the list? Does confidence just take all of these characteristics into consideration?
Here are the nine characteristics we've come up with. Testimony from a guy who is very much closed to me..
Sense of Humor
Everyone says how important sense of humor is, and I have learned to look for it in women. I am lucky enough to be able to make women laugh, but I'm still super single.
Trustworthy
Trust is the holy grail of a relationship. It takes years to build it, and it is so delicate. There are few things that take so long to attain that can be destroyed so quickly. So a lot of us may finally settle on a very trustworthy person when we finally find that.
Kindness
This seems like a no-brainer, but I've seen plenty of girls stay with guys who don't treat them well. So, I'm thinking that most women look for a nice guy, but the fact of the matter is that mean guys seem to get girlfriends too-and at a better rate than nice guys.
YachtMoney
I admit it: I sometimes envision myself marrying rich and sitting there doing nothing. I could lie out on my wife's yacht and host lavish parties and hear about how crazy the Roaring 20's were, when my wife's friends were my age. Money is definitely high on a lot of people's list: remember when Anna Nicole Smith married that really old rich guy? I doubt it was because she thought he was hot, funny, or great in the sack.
Super Hot
As much as we hate to admit it, the first thing we notice about someone else is how good or bad they look. But one of the first lessons we learn in the dating world is as beautiful as someone is on the outside, they could be ugly on the inside.
Confident
Confidence is based on a lot of these characteristics. You are confident if you are talented, super hot, intelligent, or wealthy most likely. But confidence also enables you to treat people better, so you are kind and trustworthy as well. Because confidence includes so many of these other characteristic, it may just be the one major thing women look for in a man.
Talented & Passionate
When someone possesses a special skill, such as visual art or guitar virtuosity, they get tons of girls. People like Jimi Hendrix, Led Zeppelin, and Tom Brady can go out with anyone they want because they are skilled. heck, I'd go out with them. Usually skill occurs in tandem with passion, another attractive quality. JHWhen someone is really good at something, but not "hot," it makes sense that they can still attract a lot of women. It's less annoying to see someone like this in a relationship than it is to see a rich mean guy in a relationship.
Intelligent
I am intimidated by women who are more intelligent than I am (which explains why I'm intimidated by about 97% of the female population). For a lot of people, intelligence is sexy. When someone is stupid, it's frustrating and boring, which is enough to drive someone away.
Convenient
One can argue that convenience is a huge driver for a relationship. Does he live near you, is he "ready" to be in a relationship, does he want to have kids or not? Everything matches up correctly. Sure, he may not be the best-looking guy or have a lot of money, but it's just what you need and it's been a long, difficult search.
If we put these characteristics on a pie chart, what would get the biggest piece of the pie with you? Again, some of these characteristics occur together: intelligence and wealth, talent and passion, kindness and generosity, convenience and wealth.
How often do women care about superficial things like money? It's scary, but sometimes I fear that no matter how funny I am, if I had lots of money I could date any cute girl I wanted.
How do all of these characteristics shake out for you when choosing a boyfriend, and are there any you'd add to the list? Does confidence just take all of these characteristics into consideration?
a track record
I know a fellow who is forever trying to clinch million dollar deals. But his big deals never happen! Meanwhile his car is falling apart and even his dog is getting thin.
Why? He never learned to clinch hundred dollar deals! He never developed the habit of success.
Most tycoons start washing cars or selling newspapers at about ten years of age. They develop a "success pattern". They sharpen their skills. Then they aim higher.
You first learn to catch little fish, then big fish.
Surgeons practise on tonsils before they do brain surgery!
What's so important about a success pattern? It's what gets you to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.
When you know in your heart:
1. "I've prepared myself for this,"
2. "I can do it!" and
3. "I deserve it."
you are on your way.
When you don't believe in yourself, you are dead in the water.
Also, other people's patterns will tell you more about their future than all of their promises and all of their good intentions.
If some guy wants to: a) work for you b) borrow money c) be your business partner d) give you brain surgery, look at his track record.
If there's no success pattern, look out!
Wherever you are headed, start small and make success a habit.
Why? He never learned to clinch hundred dollar deals! He never developed the habit of success.
Most tycoons start washing cars or selling newspapers at about ten years of age. They develop a "success pattern". They sharpen their skills. Then they aim higher.
You first learn to catch little fish, then big fish.
Surgeons practise on tonsils before they do brain surgery!
What's so important about a success pattern? It's what gets you to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.
When you know in your heart:
1. "I've prepared myself for this,"
2. "I can do it!" and
3. "I deserve it."
you are on your way.
When you don't believe in yourself, you are dead in the water.
Also, other people's patterns will tell you more about their future than all of their promises and all of their good intentions.
If some guy wants to: a) work for you b) borrow money c) be your business partner d) give you brain surgery, look at his track record.
If there's no success pattern, look out!
Wherever you are headed, start small and make success a habit.
Friday, December 5, 2008
a Christmas Story
One particular Christmas season a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for is annual trip, but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress.
Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom. He saw some chocolate chip cookies on the table and decided to grab a bite to cheer him up only to find that its not chocolates on top of the cookies but mouse poop.
Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great Christmas tree.
The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Fat Guy! Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"
Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress.
Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom. He saw some chocolate chip cookies on the table and decided to grab a bite to cheer him up only to find that its not chocolates on top of the cookies but mouse poop.
Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great Christmas tree.
The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Fat Guy! Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"
Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
some words and thoughts..
Imagine a boxer stepping into the ring, and telling himself:
"I'm a loser. I'm a chicken!"
How long would he last?
Imagine a singer walking onstage, and telling herself:
"I'm pathetic! They'll hate me!"
How well would she sing?
It's a recipe for disaster.
Yet, lots of us use this same recipe every day. We tell ourselves:
"I'm fat."
"I have a rotten memory."
"I'm always broke."
"I'm an idiot."
Then we wonder why we fail!
If you expect to forget, you will forget!
If you expect to be broke, you will stay broke.
If you expect to behave like an idiot ...
So how do we start to think positively?
The first step is to watch your mouth! Notice what you SAY about yourself.
From today, NEVER SAY ANYTHING BAD ABOUT YOURSELF.
Never tell people: "I'm hopeless, I always screw up, my boyfriends always dump me ..."
Make a commitment: "From today, I will not criticise myself. If I have nothing good to say about me, I will keep my mouth shut."
It's hard to control our thoughts - but we CAN control what comes out of our mouth. Once we take control of our language, we begin to have more positive thoughts ... and life gets better.
We become what we think about!
"I'm a loser. I'm a chicken!"
How long would he last?
Imagine a singer walking onstage, and telling herself:
"I'm pathetic! They'll hate me!"
How well would she sing?
It's a recipe for disaster.
Yet, lots of us use this same recipe every day. We tell ourselves:
"I'm fat."
"I have a rotten memory."
"I'm always broke."
"I'm an idiot."
Then we wonder why we fail!
If you expect to forget, you will forget!
If you expect to be broke, you will stay broke.
If you expect to behave like an idiot ...
So how do we start to think positively?
The first step is to watch your mouth! Notice what you SAY about yourself.
From today, NEVER SAY ANYTHING BAD ABOUT YOURSELF.
Never tell people: "I'm hopeless, I always screw up, my boyfriends always dump me ..."
Make a commitment: "From today, I will not criticise myself. If I have nothing good to say about me, I will keep my mouth shut."
It's hard to control our thoughts - but we CAN control what comes out of our mouth. Once we take control of our language, we begin to have more positive thoughts ... and life gets better.
We become what we think about!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
"ending a Relationship"
Ending a relationship is just like having the worst nightmare after having the best dream.......
"We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means... sacrifice."
"Often times we say goodbye to the person we love without wanting to. Though that doesnt mean that we've stopped loving them or we've stopped to care. Sometimes goodbye is a painful way to say I love you."
"Some people say the worst way to miss someone is when they are right next to you and you know you can't have them, but it's worse when you thought you didn't want them anymore and then all of a sudden you realize you can't live without them."
"Deep in your heart, you're suffering, knowing that you've lost someone . On the outside, you're living, pretending that you've forgotten him/her."
"A failing love is like desperately hanging on to something precious; not wanting to give up, but your hands feel the pain.!"
"We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means... sacrifice."
"Often times we say goodbye to the person we love without wanting to. Though that doesnt mean that we've stopped loving them or we've stopped to care. Sometimes goodbye is a painful way to say I love you."
"Some people say the worst way to miss someone is when they are right next to you and you know you can't have them, but it's worse when you thought you didn't want them anymore and then all of a sudden you realize you can't live without them."
"Deep in your heart, you're suffering, knowing that you've lost someone . On the outside, you're living, pretending that you've forgotten him/her."
"A failing love is like desperately hanging on to something precious; not wanting to give up, but your hands feel the pain.!"
Monday, December 1, 2008
excuses..
In life we have either excuses - or we have results.
It seems that some people are here just to teach us that ...
Roger Crawford was born with one leg and two arms, but no hands. What does he do? He's a professional tennis player. That is, he earned professional status and he makes his living playing and coaching tennis.
Digital Dan, of Ferndale, California was a carpenter until he got cancer of the throat and had his voice box removed. When he could no longer speak, he became a disc jockey!
Dan types his words into a laptop computer, and the laptop does the talking!
How often do we say ...
"I'm too old, too tired, too lazy, too busy... it's too hard!"
People like Roger and Dan remind us that our excuses are mostly pathetic!
Take any goal you want to achieve ... a university degree, an apartment of your own, a happy marriage, a flat stomach ... and you'll find a hundred reasons why it is inconvenient or impossible.
But all you need is ONE really good reason why you want something! Then you go and get it!
When you want something enough, you find a way.
Success is not about "the facts". It's about your attitude.
It seems that some people are here just to teach us that ...
Roger Crawford was born with one leg and two arms, but no hands. What does he do? He's a professional tennis player. That is, he earned professional status and he makes his living playing and coaching tennis.
Digital Dan, of Ferndale, California was a carpenter until he got cancer of the throat and had his voice box removed. When he could no longer speak, he became a disc jockey!
Dan types his words into a laptop computer, and the laptop does the talking!
How often do we say ...
"I'm too old, too tired, too lazy, too busy... it's too hard!"
People like Roger and Dan remind us that our excuses are mostly pathetic!
Take any goal you want to achieve ... a university degree, an apartment of your own, a happy marriage, a flat stomach ... and you'll find a hundred reasons why it is inconvenient or impossible.
But all you need is ONE really good reason why you want something! Then you go and get it!
When you want something enough, you find a way.
Success is not about "the facts". It's about your attitude.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
pROsPERITy
Some people seem to get respect wherever they go - whether they are in a department store or at the doctor's or in a hotel lobby ...
What's their secret? They treat themselves well - and other people follow. People respect you when you respect you.
My wife, Julie, says, "Everything affects everything else.
The way you walk affects the way you talk.
The way you dress affects the way you feel.
Respect yourself and you will be respected by others."
A fellow asked her, "How can I possibly improve my apartment? All I can spare is $20."
Julie said, "Buy a broom!"
Your home affects the way you feel. Create a space that will uplift you when you walk in the front door. Neatness costs nothing. Better to live in a one-room apartment that is clean, than in a mansion that's a mess.
It costs nothing to keep a clean bedroom, office, car.
How can you feel like a mover and shaker when you have holes in your underwear - or when your toes are poking out of your socks?
Fred says: "When I get successful, I'll quit living like a rat!" Wrong, Fred! To be a success you have to begin to live it, you have to feel it now.
People treat you as you treat you.
What's their secret? They treat themselves well - and other people follow. People respect you when you respect you.
My wife, Julie, says, "Everything affects everything else.
The way you walk affects the way you talk.
The way you dress affects the way you feel.
Respect yourself and you will be respected by others."
A fellow asked her, "How can I possibly improve my apartment? All I can spare is $20."
Julie said, "Buy a broom!"
Your home affects the way you feel. Create a space that will uplift you when you walk in the front door. Neatness costs nothing. Better to live in a one-room apartment that is clean, than in a mansion that's a mess.
It costs nothing to keep a clean bedroom, office, car.
How can you feel like a mover and shaker when you have holes in your underwear - or when your toes are poking out of your socks?
Fred says: "When I get successful, I'll quit living like a rat!" Wrong, Fred! To be a success you have to begin to live it, you have to feel it now.
People treat you as you treat you.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Lie Detector
John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of
unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up
trying to get him to change. One day John came home with
another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that
John claimed was actually a lie detector.
It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy,
Their 11 year old son, returned home from school.
Tommy was over 2 hours late.
'Where have you been?
Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?' asked John.
'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra
credit project,' said Tommy.
The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy,
Knocking him completely out of his chair.
'Son,' said John,
'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really
were after school.'
'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.
'What did you watch?' asked Marsha.
'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy.
The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him,
Knocking him off his chair once more.
With his lip quivering, Tommy got up,
Sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied.
We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'
'I am ashamed of you son,' said John.
'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'
The robot then walked around to John
And delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his
chair.
Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said,
'Boy, did you ever ask for that one!
You can't be too mad with Tommy.
After all, he is your son!'
With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha
And knocked her out of her chair.
unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up
trying to get him to change. One day John came home with
another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that
John claimed was actually a lie detector.
It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy,
Their 11 year old son, returned home from school.
Tommy was over 2 hours late.
'Where have you been?
Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?' asked John.
'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra
credit project,' said Tommy.
The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy,
Knocking him completely out of his chair.
'Son,' said John,
'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really
were after school.'
'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.
'What did you watch?' asked Marsha.
'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy.
The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him,
Knocking him off his chair once more.
With his lip quivering, Tommy got up,
Sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied.
We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'
'I am ashamed of you son,' said John.
'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'
The robot then walked around to John
And delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his
chair.
Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said,
'Boy, did you ever ask for that one!
You can't be too mad with Tommy.
After all, he is your son!'
With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha
And knocked her out of her chair.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Relationships
Relationships are tricky!
The strategies we think SHOULD work, don't work!
The strategies we think WON'T work, do work ...
Impressing people:
When we try to impress people - by proving that we are clever or rich or cool - people can see through us. And then we look silly.
We usually impress other people when we AREN'T TRYING to.
Chasing people:
When we chase girlfriends, boyfriends - even dogs - they run away! Why? Because we are chasing them!
When we try to trap people in relationships, they can't wait to escape!
When we LET GO of people, they often come back!
Helping people:
When we try to help others - children, friends, employees - by solving their problems, they become dependent on us - and even lazy!
Mostly, we help people by NOT HELPING too much.
Getting people's attention:
When we are desperate to be heard, we shout at people. And the louder we shout, the less they hear. Strangely, the opposite works.
People pay attention to us when we LISTEN.
The strategies we think SHOULD work, don't work!
The strategies we think WON'T work, do work ...
Impressing people:
When we try to impress people - by proving that we are clever or rich or cool - people can see through us. And then we look silly.
We usually impress other people when we AREN'T TRYING to.
Chasing people:
When we chase girlfriends, boyfriends - even dogs - they run away! Why? Because we are chasing them!
When we try to trap people in relationships, they can't wait to escape!
When we LET GO of people, they often come back!
Helping people:
When we try to help others - children, friends, employees - by solving their problems, they become dependent on us - and even lazy!
Mostly, we help people by NOT HELPING too much.
Getting people's attention:
When we are desperate to be heard, we shout at people. And the louder we shout, the less they hear. Strangely, the opposite works.
People pay attention to us when we LISTEN.
Save First
Does this ever happen at your house ...
Your family sits down to eat a big apple pie -
and in minutes, the whole pie disappears!
Even when no one is hungry, everybody eats!
Why? Because the pie is on the table.
Does this ever happen at your house ...
You get your pay cheque -
and in no time, the whole thing disappears!
Even when you don't really need to spend it, you spend it.
Why? Because the money is there.
Back to the apple pie ...
If you want to save pie for tomorrow, anybody knows,
you don't put it all on the table.
You FIRST put a slice in the refrigerator - out of reach.
So how do you save cash for the future?
You don't put it all in your wallet.
You FIRST put a slice in a special bank account - out of reach.
Just a simple strategy ...
1. Open an account.
2. Every week, before you spend one cent, deposit 10%, automatically.
Soon you won't even miss that 10%.
You say, "But I earn so little!"
Then just save a little! It will add up.
Lots of people can make big money.
Few people can save big money!
You say, "When I start making big dollars, then I'll save!"
You probably won't!
Better make it a habit now!
Here's the difference between rich and poor:
Poor people spend first and save what is left.
Rich people save first and spend what is left.
Your family sits down to eat a big apple pie -
and in minutes, the whole pie disappears!
Even when no one is hungry, everybody eats!
Why? Because the pie is on the table.
Does this ever happen at your house ...
You get your pay cheque -
and in no time, the whole thing disappears!
Even when you don't really need to spend it, you spend it.
Why? Because the money is there.
Back to the apple pie ...
If you want to save pie for tomorrow, anybody knows,
you don't put it all on the table.
You FIRST put a slice in the refrigerator - out of reach.
So how do you save cash for the future?
You don't put it all in your wallet.
You FIRST put a slice in a special bank account - out of reach.
Just a simple strategy ...
1. Open an account.
2. Every week, before you spend one cent, deposit 10%, automatically.
Soon you won't even miss that 10%.
You say, "But I earn so little!"
Then just save a little! It will add up.
Lots of people can make big money.
Few people can save big money!
You say, "When I start making big dollars, then I'll save!"
You probably won't!
Better make it a habit now!
Here's the difference between rich and poor:
Poor people spend first and save what is left.
Rich people save first and spend what is left.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
What Do Women Really Want ?
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur's youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed. The question was: What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and, to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. Well, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.
He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the priests, the wise men, the court jester. In all, he spoke with everyone but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. What most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she would know the answer. The price would be high, since the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.
The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd have to accept her price first: The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified: she was hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises... He had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend to marry her and have to endure such a burden.
Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, their wedding was proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur's question:
What a woman really wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life. Everyone instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared.
And so it went. The neighboring monarch spared Arthur's life and granted him total freedom. What a wedding Gawain and the witch had! Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate with her hands, belched and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable.
The wedding night approached: Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night, entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he'd ever seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her (when she'd been a witch), half the time she would be her horrible, deformed self, and the other half, she would be her beautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day and which during the night? What a cruel question? Gawain began to think of his predicament: During the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friend, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many intimate moments? What would you do?
What Gawain chose follows below, but don't read until you've made your own choice.
Noble Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time, because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her own life . . .
He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the priests, the wise men, the court jester. In all, he spoke with everyone but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. What most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she would know the answer. The price would be high, since the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.
The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd have to accept her price first: The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified: she was hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises... He had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend to marry her and have to endure such a burden.
Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, their wedding was proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur's question:
What a woman really wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life. Everyone instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared.
And so it went. The neighboring monarch spared Arthur's life and granted him total freedom. What a wedding Gawain and the witch had! Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate with her hands, belched and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable.
The wedding night approached: Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night, entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he'd ever seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her (when she'd been a witch), half the time she would be her horrible, deformed self, and the other half, she would be her beautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day and which during the night? What a cruel question? Gawain began to think of his predicament: During the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friend, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many intimate moments? What would you do?
What Gawain chose follows below, but don't read until you've made your own choice.
Noble Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time, because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her own life . . .
kick the worry habit...
Until we learn a lesson, we keep getting it again - and again!
IF PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU ...
If your friends expect you to solve their problems, carry their stuff, clean their mess, buy their lunch - and you keep doing it - it will keep happening.
IF YOU KEEP GETTING RIPPED OFF ...
If you allow yourself to be cheated by landlords, auto mechanics and repairmen, it will keep happening.
Until you find some courage or learn some skills, you will bleed money.
IF YOU KEEP DATING JERKS ...
If you tolerate rude, lazy, selfish boyfriends - figuring any relationship is better than no relationship - you'll meet an endless stream of "partners from hell".
History repeats itself until we make a stand.
You might say, "If I was somewhere else - maybe Hawaii - or if I had different friends - I wouldn't have these problems!" Yes you would!
When we have a weakness, it's like a magnet ... wherever we go we attract the same lessons. It's a law of life.
Miserable people say, "Why does everything happen to me?"
Effective people say, "I'd better learn this lesson, it keeps coming back!"
Assume that every problem in your life is a lesson to make you stronger. Then you never feel like a victim.
IF PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU ...
If your friends expect you to solve their problems, carry their stuff, clean their mess, buy their lunch - and you keep doing it - it will keep happening.
IF YOU KEEP GETTING RIPPED OFF ...
If you allow yourself to be cheated by landlords, auto mechanics and repairmen, it will keep happening.
Until you find some courage or learn some skills, you will bleed money.
IF YOU KEEP DATING JERKS ...
If you tolerate rude, lazy, selfish boyfriends - figuring any relationship is better than no relationship - you'll meet an endless stream of "partners from hell".
History repeats itself until we make a stand.
You might say, "If I was somewhere else - maybe Hawaii - or if I had different friends - I wouldn't have these problems!" Yes you would!
When we have a weakness, it's like a magnet ... wherever we go we attract the same lessons. It's a law of life.
Miserable people say, "Why does everything happen to me?"
Effective people say, "I'd better learn this lesson, it keeps coming back!"
Assume that every problem in your life is a lesson to make you stronger. Then you never feel like a victim.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Pain
When you accidentally bite your tongue, it's hard to see "pain" as something positive. The same goes for a blister on your big toe - who needs a throbbing foot?
But what if you felt no pain? How often would you bite off bits of your tongue -or burn your backside in the bath?
Physical pain is a marvellous alarm system that prevents further damage. It tells us: "You'd better change what you're doing!"
Emotional pain gives us a similar message, eg. "You'd better change how you're thinking!"
It's normal to get angry or jealous or a bit resentful - temporarily. But if those feelings become permanent the message may be:
"Don't expect to control other people."
"Don't expect other people to behave like you."
"Don't depend on other people to make you happy!"
While we keep thinking the same thoughts, we keep feeling the same pain.
(And then we say "But I'm right!" Unfortunately being "right" doesn't help!)
A blister on our foot is a message to change our shoes.
With emotional pain - which feels like a blister on the brain - the message is usually to change our thinking.
With both physical and emotional pain, when we keep doing the same thing, it keeps hurting!
But what if you felt no pain? How often would you bite off bits of your tongue -or burn your backside in the bath?
Physical pain is a marvellous alarm system that prevents further damage. It tells us: "You'd better change what you're doing!"
Emotional pain gives us a similar message, eg. "You'd better change how you're thinking!"
It's normal to get angry or jealous or a bit resentful - temporarily. But if those feelings become permanent the message may be:
"Don't expect to control other people."
"Don't expect other people to behave like you."
"Don't depend on other people to make you happy!"
While we keep thinking the same thoughts, we keep feeling the same pain.
(And then we say "But I'm right!" Unfortunately being "right" doesn't help!)
A blister on our foot is a message to change our shoes.
With emotional pain - which feels like a blister on the brain - the message is usually to change our thinking.
With both physical and emotional pain, when we keep doing the same thing, it keeps hurting!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Three Words
What is the theme of almost every song ever sung -
and almost every movie ever made?
LOVE.
Lost love, found love, risky love, scorned love.
It's endless! We just want love!
Almost everything we do is an attempt to get more love.
We buy cool clothes and flash cars.
We climb the corporate ladder.
We do crash diets, get Botox and pierce body parts.
Everyone you pass on the street and everyone who has ever
walked into your office is aching for love and acceptance -
and some of us are doing crazy things to get it.
We figure:
"If I look sexy, people will love me."
"If I am clever, people will love me."
"If I am successful and 97% wrinkle free, people will love me."
We can get so busy trying to find love that we forget
to love the people we care about …
Fred says, "I told my wife last month that I love her.
Doesn't she remember?"
She remembers, Fred, but she wants to be told every month.
Actually, she wants to be told every day.
Children want to hear it.
Little Johnny is born. Dad hugs him daily and tells him,
"Daddy loves you!" … until he's about six.
Then Dad decides, "My son is becoming a man."
He stops telling Johnny, "I love you."
He stops cuddling Johnny.
And Johnny wonders, "Doesn't Dad love me any more?"
I've lost count of the number of grown men
that have told me at one time or another:
"All I wanted my whole life was for my Dad to tell me
he was proud of me - that he loved me."
It is in times of tragedy that we are
reminded about what matters most.
That's when people say "If only I had told him …"
To say "I love you" costs so little and means so much.
And whenever it is too hard to say, "I love you",
"thank you" is a good start.
and almost every movie ever made?
LOVE.
Lost love, found love, risky love, scorned love.
It's endless! We just want love!
Almost everything we do is an attempt to get more love.
We buy cool clothes and flash cars.
We climb the corporate ladder.
We do crash diets, get Botox and pierce body parts.
Everyone you pass on the street and everyone who has ever
walked into your office is aching for love and acceptance -
and some of us are doing crazy things to get it.
We figure:
"If I look sexy, people will love me."
"If I am clever, people will love me."
"If I am successful and 97% wrinkle free, people will love me."
We can get so busy trying to find love that we forget
to love the people we care about …
Fred says, "I told my wife last month that I love her.
Doesn't she remember?"
She remembers, Fred, but she wants to be told every month.
Actually, she wants to be told every day.
Children want to hear it.
Little Johnny is born. Dad hugs him daily and tells him,
"Daddy loves you!" … until he's about six.
Then Dad decides, "My son is becoming a man."
He stops telling Johnny, "I love you."
He stops cuddling Johnny.
And Johnny wonders, "Doesn't Dad love me any more?"
I've lost count of the number of grown men
that have told me at one time or another:
"All I wanted my whole life was for my Dad to tell me
he was proud of me - that he loved me."
It is in times of tragedy that we are
reminded about what matters most.
That's when people say "If only I had told him …"
To say "I love you" costs so little and means so much.
And whenever it is too hard to say, "I love you",
"thank you" is a good start.
Monday, November 17, 2008
the gift box
I received this from a friend who had a choice to make. It said that I had a choice to make too.
I've chosen. Now it's your turn to choose.
The story goes that some time ago a mother punished her five year old daughter for wasting a roll of expensive gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and she became even more upset when the child used the gold paper to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.
Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift box to her mother the next morning and then said,
"This is for you, Momma."
The mother was embarrassed by her earlier over reaction, but her anger flared again when she opened
the box and found it was empty. She spoke to her daughter in a harsh manner.
"Don't you know, young lady, when you give someone a present there's supposed to be something
inside the package?"
She had tears in her eyes and said, "Oh, Momma, it's not empty! I blew kisses into it until it was full."
The mother was crushed. She fell on her knees and put her arms around her little girl, and she begged her forgiveness for her thoughtless anger.
An accident took the life of the child only a short time later, and it is told that the mother kept that gold box by her bed for all the years of her life.
Whenever she was discouraged or
faced difficult problems she would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.
In a very real sense, each of us, as human beings, have been given a Golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, family, friends and GOD. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.
You now have two choices:
1. Pass this on to your friends, or
2. Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart.
As you can see, I took choice No. 1. Friends are like angels who lift us to our feet, when our wings have troubles.
I've chosen. Now it's your turn to choose.
The story goes that some time ago a mother punished her five year old daughter for wasting a roll of expensive gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and she became even more upset when the child used the gold paper to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.
Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift box to her mother the next morning and then said,
"This is for you, Momma."
The mother was embarrassed by her earlier over reaction, but her anger flared again when she opened
the box and found it was empty. She spoke to her daughter in a harsh manner.
"Don't you know, young lady, when you give someone a present there's supposed to be something
inside the package?"
She had tears in her eyes and said, "Oh, Momma, it's not empty! I blew kisses into it until it was full."
The mother was crushed. She fell on her knees and put her arms around her little girl, and she begged her forgiveness for her thoughtless anger.
An accident took the life of the child only a short time later, and it is told that the mother kept that gold box by her bed for all the years of her life.
Whenever she was discouraged or
faced difficult problems she would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.
In a very real sense, each of us, as human beings, have been given a Golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, family, friends and GOD. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.
You now have two choices:
1. Pass this on to your friends, or
2. Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart.
As you can see, I took choice No. 1. Friends are like angels who lift us to our feet, when our wings have troubles.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
movie: the shopgirl
If ever there’s a movie that would sum up the story of my life, it
would be SHOPGIRL. When I saw the movie, I thought that they were
filming my own life. I was the Shopgirl.
I was the lonely and depressed girl on the film. I was that girl who
felt dead inside. There was a scene where the Shopgirl was lying in bed
and dreaming of possibilities that would never come. I was the girl who
painted by herself. The girl who read books before she slept. I was the
one who lived and yet not lived.
There was a scene when the Shopgirl suffered from a bout of
depression. She couldn’t move. She just stayed in bed and was
catatonic. There was a point in my life when I was like that. I just
curled up into a little ball and stayed in bed. I didn’t want to stand
up. I just wanted to stay in bed. I was extremely depressed and unsure
if I would survive another day. I would cry myself to sleep. When the
morning came, I’d be sad again. And I’d be wondering if I’d make it to
the next day.
But in the end, the Shopgirl found true love. And that changed her.
And she no longer became depressed. The story had a happy ending.
If I hadn’t met Buddhism, I would still be depressed right now. Or
worse, I’d be dead. Buddhism is just a tool. But actually, I wanted
change in my life. When you welcome change, when you are ready for it,
it will just come to you. And it came in the form of Buddhism, new
friendships and new relationships.
Depression is spiritual death. And I had to come to the point of
death to find my way back to life again. There is life after death. And
I found life through Buddhism.
would be SHOPGIRL. When I saw the movie, I thought that they were
filming my own life. I was the Shopgirl.
I was the lonely and depressed girl on the film. I was that girl who
felt dead inside. There was a scene where the Shopgirl was lying in bed
and dreaming of possibilities that would never come. I was the girl who
painted by herself. The girl who read books before she slept. I was the
one who lived and yet not lived.
There was a scene when the Shopgirl suffered from a bout of
depression. She couldn’t move. She just stayed in bed and was
catatonic. There was a point in my life when I was like that. I just
curled up into a little ball and stayed in bed. I didn’t want to stand
up. I just wanted to stay in bed. I was extremely depressed and unsure
if I would survive another day. I would cry myself to sleep. When the
morning came, I’d be sad again. And I’d be wondering if I’d make it to
the next day.
But in the end, the Shopgirl found true love. And that changed her.
And she no longer became depressed. The story had a happy ending.
If I hadn’t met Buddhism, I would still be depressed right now. Or
worse, I’d be dead. Buddhism is just a tool. But actually, I wanted
change in my life. When you welcome change, when you are ready for it,
it will just come to you. And it came in the form of Buddhism, new
friendships and new relationships.
Depression is spiritual death. And I had to come to the point of
death to find my way back to life again. There is life after death. And
I found life through Buddhism.
to my friends out there!
HAPPY Friends DAY!!!
Happiness keeps You Sweet, Trials keep You Strong, Sorrows keep You Human, Failures keep You Humble, Success keeps You Glowing, But Only God keeps You Going! You are so special!
Happiness is NOT something you find, It’s something you create. Nothing in this world is IMPOSSIBLE ,,, coz the word IMPOSSIBLE itself says I M POSSIBLE.. KEEP SMILING ALWAYS Believe in doing ordinary things in an extraordinary manner Working hard is not enough; one has to keep on sharpening one’s skills.
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. Good friends care for each other, close friends understand each other and TRUE friends stay forever….. Beyond words….. Beyond distance. Angels Do Exist…but, sometimes, they don’t have wings, We call them Friends
Happiness keeps You Sweet, Trials keep You Strong, Sorrows keep You Human, Failures keep You Humble, Success keeps You Glowing, But Only God keeps You Going! You are so special!
Happiness is NOT something you find, It’s something you create. Nothing in this world is IMPOSSIBLE ,,, coz the word IMPOSSIBLE itself says I M POSSIBLE.. KEEP SMILING ALWAYS Believe in doing ordinary things in an extraordinary manner Working hard is not enough; one has to keep on sharpening one’s skills.
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. Good friends care for each other, close friends understand each other and TRUE friends stay forever….. Beyond words….. Beyond distance. Angels Do Exist…but, sometimes, they don’t have wings, We call them Friends
Friday, November 14, 2008
Presence of Being
No tears are ever wasted if you just believe that God fills your tears. God is everything. God is your thoughts. God is your sadness. God is your tears.
As long as you believe that sadness and sorrow has a purpose, no tears are ever wasted. Everything that we do, as long as we do it with God at the center of our lives, nothing is ever wasted.
Everything has a purpose. Even tragedies have a purpose. Pain and suffering has a purpose. And we never suffer alone. God suffers with us. God feels our pain.
We will never walk alone. We are never alone. As long as we fill our lives with the presence of our being.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
valued insights
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
the rabbit and the turtle
Interlude
When Roberto Goizueta took over as CEO of Coca-Cola in the 1980s, he was faced with intense competition from Pepsi that was eating into Coke's growth.
His executives were Pepsi-focused and intent on increasing market share 0.1% a time.
Goizueta decided to stop competing against Pepsi and instead compete against the situation of 0.1% growth.
He asked his executives what was the average fluid intake of an American per day? The answer was 14 ounces. What was Coke's share of that? Two ounces. Goizueta said Coke needed a larger share of that market.
The competition wasn't Pepsi. It was the water, tea, coffee, milk and fruit juices that went into the remaining 12 ounces. The public should reach for a Coke whenever they felt like drinking something.
To this end, Coke put up vending machines at every street corner. Sales took a quantum jump and Pepsi has never quite caught up since.
_____________________________________________
The New Rabbit-Turtle Race — in real life
Episode #1—the story we know as a child
Once upon a time a tortoise and a hare had an argument about who was faster. They decided to settle the argument with a race. They agreed on a route and started off the race.
The hare shot ahead and ran briskly for some time. Then seeing that he was far ahead of the tortoise, he thought he'd sit under a tree for some time and relax before continuing the race.
He sat under the tree and soon fell asleep. The tortoise plodding on overtook him and soon finished the race, emerging as the undisputed champ.
The hare woke up and realised that he'd lost the race. The moral of the story is that slow and steady wins the race.
This is the version of the story that we've all grown up with.
Episode #2
The hare was disappointed at losing the race and he did some Defect Prevention (Root Cause Analysis). He realised that he'd lost the race only because he had been overconfident, careless and lax.
If he had not taken things for granted, there's no way the tortoise could have beaten him. So he challenged the tortoise to another race. The tortoise agreed.
This time, the hare went all out and ran without stopping from start to finish. He won by several miles.
The moral of the story? Fast and consistent will always beat the slow and steady.
If you have two people in your organisation, one slow, methodical and reliable, and the other fast and still reliable at what he does, the fast and reliable chap will consistently climb the organisational ladder faster than the slow, methodical chap.
It's good to be slow and steady; but it's better to be fast and reliable.
But the story doesn't end here…
Episode #3
The tortoise did some thinking this time, and realised that there's no way he can beat the hare in a race the way it was currently formatted.
He thought for a while, and then challenged the hare to another race, but on a slightly different route.
The hare agreed. They started off. In keeping with his self-made commitment to be consistently fast, the hare took off and ran at top speed until he came to a broad river.
The finishing line was a couple of kilometers on the other side of the river.
The hare sat there wondering what to do. In the meantime the tortoise trundled along, got into the river, swam to the opposite bank, continued walking and finished the race.
The moral of the story? First identify your core competency and then change the playing field to suit your core competency.
In an organisation, if you are a good speaker, make sure you create opportunities to give presentations that enable the senior management to notice you.
If your strength is analysis, make sure you do some sort of research, make a report and send it upstairs. Working to your strengths will not only get you noticed but will also create opportunities for growth and advancement.
The story still hasn't ended.
Episode #4
The hare and the tortoise, by this time, had become pretty good friends and they did some thinking together. Both realised that the last race could have been run much better.
So they decided to do the last race again, but to run as a team this time.
They started off, and this time the hare carried the tortoise till the riverbank. There, the tortoise took over and swam across with the hare on his back.
On the opposite bank, the hare again carried the tortoise and they reached the finishing line together. They both felt a greater sense of satisfaction than they'd felt earlier.
The moral of the story? It's good to be individually brilliant and to have strong core competencies; but unless you're able to work in a team and harness each other's core competencies, you'll always perform below par because there will always be situations at which you'll do poorly and someone else does well.
Teamwork is mainly about situational leadership, letting the person with the relevant core competency for a situation take leadership.
There are more lessons to be learnt from this story….
Note that neither the hare nor the tortoise gave up after failures. The hare decided to work harder and put in more effort after his failure.
The tortoise changed his strategy because he was already working as hard as he could. In life, when faced with failure, sometimes it is appropriate to work harder and put in more effort.
Sometimes it is appropriate to change strategy and try something different. And sometimes it is appropriate to do both.
The hare and the tortoise also learnt another vital lesson. When we stop competing against a rival and instead start competing against the situation, we perform far better.
When Roberto Goizueta took over as CEO of Coca-Cola in the 1980s, he was faced with intense competition from Pepsi that was eating into Coke's growth.
His executives were Pepsi-focused and intent on increasing market share 0.1% a time.
Goizueta decided to stop competing against Pepsi and instead compete against the situation of 0.1% growth.
He asked his executives what was the average fluid intake of an American per day? The answer was 14 ounces. What was Coke's share of that? Two ounces. Goizueta said Coke needed a larger share of that market.
The competition wasn't Pepsi. It was the water, tea, coffee, milk and fruit juices that went into the remaining 12 ounces. The public should reach for a Coke whenever they felt like drinking something.
To this end, Coke put up vending machines at every street corner. Sales took a quantum jump and Pepsi has never quite caught up since.
_____________________________________________
The New Rabbit-Turtle Race — in real life
Episode #1—the story we know as a child
Once upon a time a tortoise and a hare had an argument about who was faster. They decided to settle the argument with a race. They agreed on a route and started off the race.
The hare shot ahead and ran briskly for some time. Then seeing that he was far ahead of the tortoise, he thought he'd sit under a tree for some time and relax before continuing the race.
He sat under the tree and soon fell asleep. The tortoise plodding on overtook him and soon finished the race, emerging as the undisputed champ.
The hare woke up and realised that he'd lost the race. The moral of the story is that slow and steady wins the race.
This is the version of the story that we've all grown up with.
Episode #2
The hare was disappointed at losing the race and he did some Defect Prevention (Root Cause Analysis). He realised that he'd lost the race only because he had been overconfident, careless and lax.
If he had not taken things for granted, there's no way the tortoise could have beaten him. So he challenged the tortoise to another race. The tortoise agreed.
This time, the hare went all out and ran without stopping from start to finish. He won by several miles.
The moral of the story? Fast and consistent will always beat the slow and steady.
If you have two people in your organisation, one slow, methodical and reliable, and the other fast and still reliable at what he does, the fast and reliable chap will consistently climb the organisational ladder faster than the slow, methodical chap.
It's good to be slow and steady; but it's better to be fast and reliable.
But the story doesn't end here…
Episode #3
The tortoise did some thinking this time, and realised that there's no way he can beat the hare in a race the way it was currently formatted.
He thought for a while, and then challenged the hare to another race, but on a slightly different route.
The hare agreed. They started off. In keeping with his self-made commitment to be consistently fast, the hare took off and ran at top speed until he came to a broad river.
The finishing line was a couple of kilometers on the other side of the river.
The hare sat there wondering what to do. In the meantime the tortoise trundled along, got into the river, swam to the opposite bank, continued walking and finished the race.
The moral of the story? First identify your core competency and then change the playing field to suit your core competency.
In an organisation, if you are a good speaker, make sure you create opportunities to give presentations that enable the senior management to notice you.
If your strength is analysis, make sure you do some sort of research, make a report and send it upstairs. Working to your strengths will not only get you noticed but will also create opportunities for growth and advancement.
The story still hasn't ended.
Episode #4
The hare and the tortoise, by this time, had become pretty good friends and they did some thinking together. Both realised that the last race could have been run much better.
So they decided to do the last race again, but to run as a team this time.
They started off, and this time the hare carried the tortoise till the riverbank. There, the tortoise took over and swam across with the hare on his back.
On the opposite bank, the hare again carried the tortoise and they reached the finishing line together. They both felt a greater sense of satisfaction than they'd felt earlier.
The moral of the story? It's good to be individually brilliant and to have strong core competencies; but unless you're able to work in a team and harness each other's core competencies, you'll always perform below par because there will always be situations at which you'll do poorly and someone else does well.
Teamwork is mainly about situational leadership, letting the person with the relevant core competency for a situation take leadership.
There are more lessons to be learnt from this story….
Note that neither the hare nor the tortoise gave up after failures. The hare decided to work harder and put in more effort after his failure.
The tortoise changed his strategy because he was already working as hard as he could. In life, when faced with failure, sometimes it is appropriate to work harder and put in more effort.
Sometimes it is appropriate to change strategy and try something different. And sometimes it is appropriate to do both.
The hare and the tortoise also learnt another vital lesson. When we stop competing against a rival and instead start competing against the situation, we perform far better.
angry? don't be.
Anger. It’s easy to define: the noise of the soul. Anger. The unseen irritant of the heart. Anger. the relentless invader of silence…
The louder it gets the more desperate we become…
Some of you are thinking… you don’t have any idea how hard my life has been. and you’re right, i don’t. But i have a very clear idea how miserable your future will be unless you deal with anger.
X-ray the world of the vengeful and behold the tumore of bitterness: black, menacing, malignant. Carcinoma of the spirit.Its fatal fibers creep around the edge of the heart and ravage it. Yesterday you can’t alter, but your reaction to your yesterday you can. The past you cannot change. But your response to your past yoiu can.
When God Whispers your name.
Monday, November 10, 2008
with a smile
life is full of surprises. Nobody knows what will happen next. for me, There are two types of life’s surprises: the good surprise and somewhat bad surprise.
Storms may come in my life but as long as I have FAITH in GOD these storms will remain a storm and it wont never be a typoon. I know GOD wont give us trials that we can’t bear. These makes us stronger person after all.
I face every trials with a smile in my lips coz i know GOD is always there to help me anytime, anywhere.
Storms may come in my life but as long as I have FAITH in GOD these storms will remain a storm and it wont never be a typoon. I know GOD wont give us trials that we can’t bear. These makes us stronger person after all.
I face every trials with a smile in my lips coz i know GOD is always there to help me anytime, anywhere.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
asking for "God's Miracle"
Remember that in God’s economy, a miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law.
Prayer:
Lord, I want to be a woman of faith who lives each day, expecting a miracle from Your hand. Give me an attitude of anticipation and an obedient heart that is willing to step out in faith, asking and believing that a miracle is on its way. Help me remember to measure every supernatural work against the truth of the Bible. Help me to celebrate the “small” miracles as well as the “big” ones. I praise You for Your presence and power in my life. In Jesus’ name. Amen!
It is often hard to wait out God's answer. I think especially hard when you are nearing an age where you know your time is running out on your other dreams. But a miracle is that a miracle, it meant when its impossible then God will send you a miracle. Sarah couldn't believe she can still bear a child at her age, and so did Elizabeth, yet they did, it was a miracle and it was also the fulfillment of God's promise to their husbands for their faithfulness.
a track record
I know a fellow who is forever trying to clinch million dollar deals. But his big deals never happen! Meanwhile his car is falling apart and even his dog is getting thin.Why? He never learned to clinch hundred dollar deals! He never developed the habit of success.Most tycoons start washing cars or selling newspapers at about ten years of age. They develop a "success pattern". They sharpen their skills. Then they aim higher.You first learn to catch little fish, then big fish.Surgeons practise on tonsils before they do brain surgery!What's so important about a success pattern? It's what gets you to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. When you know in your heart:1. "I've prepared myself for this,"2. "I can do it!" and3. "I deserve it."you are on your way.When you don't believe in yourself, you are dead in the water.Also, other people's patterns will tell you more about their future than all of their promises and all of their good intentions. If some guy wants to: a) work for you b) borrow money c) be your business partner d) give you brain surgery, look at his track record. If there's no success pattern, look out!
Wherever you are headed, start small and make success a habit.
Wherever you are headed, start small and make success a habit.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Resign? or not to?
i’m here sitting in front of my computer creating a blog post about what’s happening to my life now…i’m tired of reading long blogs so i’ll try to keep my blog as short as possible.. user-friendly,, that’s what it should always be…
actually, i’m in the middle of contemplating whether i should resign from my work or not.. yes, i got a good pay, but i feel that my skills are slowlly degrading because they’re not used and improved. i should take my nclex as soon as possible so i can leave…that’s what i always say to myself but unfortunately, it’s not as easy as i thought it should be.. i still have to earn.. and sacrifice..
i have a good pay here.. lots of bonus.. three times more than what the hospital nurse receives every month.. lots of bonuses.. plus i get to be with youngsters…
4 months more and let’s see if there are some changes…
Thursday, November 6, 2008
alone?
i was alone.. i was in the verge of falling into depression but somehow i managed it with plastic pieces.. know what i did??? i let it all out, displacing all my anger in shattered pieces.. tears were falling.. silence was deafening.. all i could hear was the sound of plastic pieces broken into small pieces..
it was expensive, yet i let my anger be displaced into it rather than losing my sanity…
afterwards, a mask covered what i felt.. i wanted to drink but then i don’t want to get drunk..
just a single message comforted me.. it was him..
i was never alone.. i just chose to be alone..
fruit of hard work..
It was 6pm of October 10..I went home, feeling really really tired. It was a long busy day…. When I arrived home, just as what i have been doing for the past 21 days, I immediately checked the mailbox for any letter..I was like a kid anticipating from a gift from Santa Claus..whew!
And yes, it was there,a small long envelop that contains the result of my NCLEX..I was trembling when I opened it.Inside it, was one piece letter that notifies me I passed the NCLEX and I need to submit my SSnumber. Wheew! I cant believe it.I made it, Thank God.He really heard my prayers.God is so good.(all the time..)
I just would like to thank the people who have been there for me always..Without them..I could have not made it…Thanks to all!mwaah
And yes, it was there,a small long envelop that contains the result of my NCLEX..I was trembling when I opened it.Inside it, was one piece letter that notifies me I passed the NCLEX and I need to submit my SSnumber. Wheew! I cant believe it.I made it, Thank God.He really heard my prayers.God is so good.(all the time..)
I just would like to thank the people who have been there for me always..Without them..I could have not made it…Thanks to all!mwaah
a Single's Blog
i received this forwarded msg:
" i don’t have any sleeping disorder. I have no worries, no fears, no nothing, just myself…..but wen I met a couple dis morning, laughing together, holding their hands tightly and looking thru each other’s eyes…..its harder for me to sleep now. I THOUGHT, I’M BETTER OFF ALONE..BUT maybe they are right ..maybe it would be nicer to spend your time with someone that you love, someone who means something to you..maybe i’ll gonna try it..not for now but soon..soon enough wen i find someone to share my life with…..
—–i guess we all do share the same sentiments…..
boys will be boys...
Boys will be boys and we should rather be careful with this statement… I’d already had a boyfriend if boys are not *********… Hey, it’s not that I’m bitter or cynical about love.I’m not closing my mind on this matter. I also wished that prince charming would free me from this wicked spell…and we will live happily ever after… Yet I know "ever after only happens in fairy tales". Nothing lasts forever. I know there are pretty princesses who found their knight in shining armor and wow they are really lucky…. But reality bites, we cannot deny the existence of ass***,players, two timers and etc.(whatever we want to call them) .and sad to say there have been an increase in multiplication of this unwanted species…….I know there are still or shall I say few good men down there.. (don't forget to count your dad and brother in)
Everyday i try to prove myself how wrong I am with my theory about boys..everyday i give them the benefit of a doubt hoping that they’ve prove otherwise. And yet, though i find a lot of reasons to like them. i find a lot of reasons why I SHOULD NOT TRUST THEM. BOYS ARE GREAT FRIENDS (no doubt about that) and YET NOT BOYFRIENDS……. unless someone would prove me wrong…
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
rubber band
Let me tell you a crazy story I heard recently.There' s this husband whoout of sheer love for his wife decided to prove it to her. So he swam thewidest oceans, crossed the deepest rivers, and climbed the highestmountains to show his deep devotion to her. But in the end, she divorcedhim.Why? Because he was never home.(Get it?)Let me tell you an experience I
had as a kid. One day, I asked Mom, "Why domy shoes keep eating my socks?" As a young boy, that was always a mysteryfor me. All my other classmates never had that problem. Their socksremained tight and high up their legs the entire day.Mom didn't answer my question but simply gave me two rubber bands which Idutifully placed around the top of my socks. To this day, fifteen yearslater, I still have permanent circle marks around my legs. But aside fromgiving me this slight defect, the two bands worked like magic.It never occurred to me that Dad and Mom didn't have the money to buy a newpair of socks for me. So I wore five-year-old socks, all soggy, grayish,and garter less. And yet amazingly, I nev er
complained. I believe it wasbecause Dad was always home when I needed him. Every night, after comingfrom work, we'd jog together, sit around, and talk about Tarzan, FarrahFawcett Majors,God, and what I wanted to be when I grew up (a stockholder). On Saturdays, we'd walk to Cubao, eat a hotdog-on-a- stick,and buy newrubber bands before going home.I've learned that in truth, we don't want our loved ones to show their lovefor us in big ways. Swimming the widest oceans,crossing the deepest rivers,and climbing the highest mountains seem spectacular - but that's not whatwe really want. Deep in our hearts, we just want them home. With us.Sometimes, God will operate that way. Suddenly, He decides not t o
answerour prayers, or fill our need, or heal our sickness, or give us the miraclewe're asking for. (He's got reasons why He won't, and believe me - they'repretty good ones.) So He'll just be there beside you, holding you in a hug.Sharing your pain. Weeping as you weep. Oh, He might give you some rubberbands. And that small comfort from Him will be more than enough to sustainyou. Because the most essential truth you already know.
Monday, November 3, 2008
HOLY WITTICISM
HOLY HUMOR... Good thoughts indeed!
1. There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY Trespassers will be baptized!
2. "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace."
3. "Free Trip to heaven Details Inside!"
4. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin Robbins."
5. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"
6. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets."
7. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
8. "People are like tea bags -- you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."
9. "Fight truth decay -- study the Bible daily."
10. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Nonsmoking?"
11. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"
12. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."
13. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."
14. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."
15. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."
16. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again"
17. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon."
18. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" (U R)
19. "In the dark? Follow the Son"
20. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."
21. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."
God Bless and pass it on!
1. There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY Trespassers will be baptized!
2. "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace."
3. "Free Trip to heaven Details Inside!"
4. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin Robbins."
5. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"
6. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets."
7. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
8. "People are like tea bags -- you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."
9. "Fight truth decay -- study the Bible daily."
10. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Nonsmoking?"
11. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"
12. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."
13. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."
14. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."
15. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."
16. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again"
17. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon."
18. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" (U R)
19. "In the dark? Follow the Son"
20. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."
21. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."
God Bless and pass it on!
Monday, October 27, 2008
GOD is there, isn't He?
This will give you the chills........ GOOD chills. A young man had been to Wednesday Night Bible Study. The Pastor had shared about listening to God and obeying the Lord's voice The young man couldn't help but wonder, "Does God still speak to people?" After service, he went out with some friends for coffee and pie and they discussed the message. Several different ones talked about how God had led them in different ways. It was about ten o'clock when the young man started driving home. Sitting in his car, he just began to pray, "God...If you still speak to people, speak to me. I will listen. I will do my best to obey." As he drove down the main street of his town, he had the strangest thought to stop and buy a gallon of milk. He shook his head and said out loud, "God is that you?" He didn't get a reply and started on toward home. But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk. The young man thought about Samuel and how he didn't recognize the voice of God, and how little Samuel ran to Eli. "Okay, God, in case that is you, I will buy the milk." It didn't seem like too hard a test of obedience. He could always use the milk. He stopped and purchased the gallon of milk and started off toward home. As he passed Seventh Street , he again felt the urge, "Turn Down that street." This is crazy he thought, and drove on past the intersection. Again, he felt that he should turn down Seventh Street . At the next intersection, he turned back and headed down Seventh. Half jokingly, he said out loud, "Okay, God, I will." He drove several blocks, when suddenly, he felt like he should stop. He pulled over to the curb and looked around. He was in a semi- commercial area of town. It wasn't the best but it wasn't the worst of neighborhoods either. The businesses were closed and most of the houses looked dark like the people were already in bed. Again, he sensed something, "Go and give the milk to the people in the house across the street." The young man looked at the house. It was dark and it looked like the people were either gone or they were already asleep. He started to open the door and then sat back in the car seat. "Lord, this is insane. Those people are asleep and if I wake them up, they are going to be mad and I will look stupid." Again, he felt like he should go and give the milk. Finally, he opened the door, "Okay God, if this is you, I will go to the door and I will give them the milk. If you want me to look like a crazy person, okay. I want to be obedient. I guess that will count for something, but if they don't answer right away, I am out of here." He walked across the street an d rang the bell. He could hear some noise inside. A man's voice yelled out, "Who is it? What do you want?" Then the door opened before the young man could get away. The man was standing there in his jeans and T-shirt. He looked like he just got out of bed. He had a strange look on his face and he didn't seem too happy to have some stranger standing on his doorstep. "What is it?" The young man thrust out the gallon of milk, "Here, I brought this to you." The man took the milk and rushed down a hallway. Then from down the hall came a woman carrying the milk toward the kitchen. The man was following her holding a baby. The baby was c rying. The man had tears streaming down his face. The man began speaking and half crying, "We were just praying. We had some big bills this month and we ran out of money. We didn't have any milk for our baby. I was just praying and asking God to show me how to get some milk." His wife in the kitchen yelled out, "I ask him to send an Angel with some. Are you an Angel?" The young man reached into his wallet and pulled out all the money he had on him and put in the man's hand. He turned and walked back toward his car and the tears were streaming down his face. He knew that God still answers prayers. THIS IS A SIMPLE TEST.... If you believe that God is alive and well, send this to at least ten people and the person that sent it to you!!!!!!!! This is so true. Sometimes it's the simplest things that God asks us to do that cause us, if we are obedient to what He's asking, to be able to hear. His voice more clear than ever. Please listen, and obey! It will bless you (and the world). Phil 4:13 This is an easy test - you score 100 or zero. It's your choice. If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father." Not ashamed...Pass this on.
Unconditional Love...
A story is told about a soldier who was finally coming home after having fought in Vietnam. He called his parents from San Francisco,
"Mom and Dad, I'm coming home, But I have a favor to ask. I have a friend I'd like to bring home with me."
"Sure" they replied. " We'd love to meet him."
"There's something you should know" the son continued, "he was hurt pretty badly in the fighting. He stepped on a land mind and lost an arm and a leg. He has nowhere else to go, and I want him to come live with us."
"Mom and Dad, I'm coming home, But I have a favor to ask. I have a friend I'd like to bring home with me."
"Sure" they replied. " We'd love to meet him."
"There's something you should know" the son continued, "he was hurt pretty badly in the fighting. He stepped on a land mind and lost an arm and a leg. He has nowhere else to go, and I want him to come live with us."
"Son" said the father, " You don't know what you're asking, someone with such a handicap would be a terrible burden on us. We have our own lives to live, and we cant let something like this interfere with our lives. I think you should just come home and forget about this guy. He'll find a way to live of his own."
At that point the son hung up the phone. The parents heard nothing more from him. A few days later, however, they received a call from the San Francisco Police. Their son had died after falling from a building, they were told. The police believed it was suicide. The grief-stricken parents flew to San Francisco and were taken to the city morgue to identify the body of their son. They recognized him, but to their horror they also discovered something they didn't know, their son had only one arm and one leg.
The parents in this story are like many of us . We find it easy to love those who are good-looking or fun to have around, and we don't like people who inconvenience us or make us feel uncomfortable. We would rather stay away from those people who aren't as healthy, beautiful or smart as we are. Thankfully, there's someone who won't treat us that way. Someone who loves us with an unconditional love that welcome us into a forever family, regardless of how messed up we are.
GOD loves you.
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