Relationships are tricky!
The strategies we think SHOULD work, don't work!
The strategies we think WON'T work, do work ...
Impressing people:
When we try to impress people - by proving that we are clever or rich or cool - people can see through us. And then we look silly.
We usually impress other people when we AREN'T TRYING to.
Chasing people:
When we chase girlfriends, boyfriends - even dogs - they run away! Why? Because we are chasing them!
When we try to trap people in relationships, they can't wait to escape!
When we LET GO of people, they often come back!
Helping people:
When we try to help others - children, friends, employees - by solving their problems, they become dependent on us - and even lazy!
Mostly, we help people by NOT HELPING too much.
Getting people's attention:
When we are desperate to be heard, we shout at people. And the louder we shout, the less they hear. Strangely, the opposite works.
People pay attention to us when we LISTEN.
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